


Saying Goodbye (Is more painful than I thought.)

by TotallyNot



Category: The Maze Runner (Movies), The Maze Runner Series - All Media Types, The Maze Runner Series - James Dashner
Genre: Book/Movie 3: The Death Cure, Gay, M/M, The Death Cure, impled death?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-21
Updated: 2019-01-21
Packaged: 2019-10-14 02:52:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 735
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17500187
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TotallyNot/pseuds/TotallyNot
Summary: Newt writes his goodbye letter to Thomas.





	Saying Goodbye (Is more painful than I thought.)

Newt's hand shook as he walked outside. Thomas was coming up with a plan for rescuing Minho, and as much as Newt missed his best friend, he couldn't ignore or delay the inevitable. Everyone knew he had the flare, and as hard as it was to accept it, Newt knew that he didn’t have much time left. It was funny, how little he cared. It was his own life, and yet he felt no need to search for a cure.   

  

The person who seemed to care most was Thomas. Newt had seen the way that Thomas' eyes had widened when he had seen how fare gone Newt was. When he had seen the way Newt's arm looked.   

  

Newt brushed the  image  out of his head, and slumped down against the wall. He pulled out a piece of paper and a pencil that he had grabbed from indoors, and started to write.   

  

 _"Dear Thomas,_   

 _This is the first letter I can  remember  writing. Obviously, I don't know if I wrote any before the Maze. But, even if it's not my first, it's likely to be my last._   

 _I want you to know that I'm not scared. Well, not of dying, anyway. It's more forgetting. It's losing myself to this virus, that's what scares me._   

 _So every night I've been saying their names out loud. Alby, Winston, Chuck._   

 _And I repeat them over and over like a prayer and it all comes flooding back."_   

  

Newt took a deep, shuddering  breath, and felt a tear slip down his face, and hit the paper. He wiped it off, and touched the pencil down again.  

  

 _"Just the little things, like when the sun used to hit the Glade at that perfect moment right before it slipped beneath the walls._   

 _And I remember the taste of Frypan's stew. I never thought I'd miss that stuff so much._   

 _And I remember you._   

 _I remember the first time you came up in the Box, just a scared little Greenie who couldn't even remember his own name."_   

  

Newt remembered Thomas coming up in the box, not knowing where he was, and yet having that instinct to get out, to escape, right away. He remembered getting irrationally jealous when Teresa came up, and Thomas' attention went straight to her.  

  

 Newt remembered Thomas waking up in the middle of the night, when they were in the Scorch, and telling Newt that he remembered life before the maze. Remembered him before the maze, and most importantly, remembered them. Racing through the halls of W.I.C.K.E.D. as quiet as they could, and then hiding in a closet, giggling, and shushing each other. The first hidden kiss, one of many that Newt couldn't remember. But he still smiled as Thomas recalled everything. Everything from their real life. Tears started to flood down Newt's face, and he took a moment, knowing he wouldn’t be able to finish the letter if he kept on like this.  

  

 _"From that moment you ran into the Maze, I knew I would follow you anywhere. And I have. We all have._   

 _If I could do it all over again, I would. And I wouldn't change a thing._   

 _My hope for you is when you're looking back, years from now, you'll be able to say the same._   

 _The future is in your hands now, Tommy. And I know you'll find a way to do what's right. You always have._   

 _Take care of everyone for me. And take care of yourself. You deserve to be happy."_   

  

Newt's heart broke as he thought about leaving behind his best friend. He sobbed quietly to himself as he pictured Thomas going on without him.   

  

 _"Thank you for being my friend._   

 _Goodbye, mate._   

 _Newt."_   

  

Newt wiped away the tears, and folded up the piece of paper, sticking it in his sock, and walked back into the room, fake-smiling at Thomas, pretending like everything would be fine. Like they could find a cure, and like their relationship wasn't going to come to a  screeching  halt.   

  

As Thomas went to bed, Newt took out his letter, and left it on Thomas' makeshift bedside table, with the little dandelion Thomas had given Newt in the Glade, what felt like years ago.  

  

"I love you," Newt whispered as he left the room. "Goodbye," he said, as he excited the building, feeling just as broken as the city of Cranks around him. 

**Author's Note:**

> Well this is crap, but drop a like if you're inclined.


End file.
